Friday, 24 February 2023

Transparent families are healthy families

“At that time,” declares the Lord, “I will be the God of all the families of Israel, and they shall be My people.”

Just pondering something which is really starting to hit home. As I travel churches and countries, various cultures and kind friends generously invite me into their family homes. I have come to love the home which just treats me the same as a normal member of the family, the home which doesn't tidy up with obsession in advance, or do anything different for food. (JFI Homemade authentic local cuisine is always infinitely more moreish than an attempt at the narrow perception of what a brit can cope with). I am therefore pondering what this means for the family of God. In what ways do we not need to pretend to be something we are not, and offer a treasured welcome to so many in need of the welcome of Christ's family?





Home is a place of reality and acceptance without pretence.

One of the beauties about living daily with those you love is that your devotion is tested and active. Relationship goes deeper, the flavour is richer and fuller when true family effervesces in the same pot. There is such an inexplicable beauty when this works. Home is a place where I should not need to pretend, but am accepted, unconditionally dealt with in love whether in discipline or encouragement. 

A long time ago in a land not so far away, there was no such thing as "virtual church". In fact the very DNA of church is real true family, the creation of the triune God (who is himself 3 in 1), who comes to live with his people, his people live with him, and each other. Our daily abiding is what we are, who we are, and is to signal to the world the joy of the privileged place that grace has chosen for our home. This grace community, is also supposed to be over-flowingly generous with all that they enjoy out of God's kindness. Our joy should overspill to daily   invitation of welcome  to join the family of grace, as extensions are built to accommodate all new comers, and new homes built on the family land reaching far and wide. Our "familyness" in God is to authenticate the gospel we preach and the character of the wonderful Father we live under. 43 explicit times in the bible the thread of God living with his people and being the presence and identity of his family  runs through the family history of his people and the new community. (see verse index at the end) 

“I will dwell in them and walk among them;

And I will be their God, and they shall be My people."

A worrying trend:

However, in our age image is often more treasured than reality. In our digital age we project who we want to be. The spirit of our age is to copy those who influence, to ape the appearance of those who are seen to be popular, and yes be a "virtual family" or projected version of ourselves, even when in the same room. Avoiding reality for the idolatry of what is virtual is unhealthy on so many levels. Have you visited a home where each are on their phones all at the same time ? How bizarre to be in the room or home with those we share blood with but only communicate electronically, or reduce conversation to soundbites, yet at the same time talk verbosely about all kinds of rubbish with others around the world.  When family Facebook photos are only full of fake smiles, perfectly tidy kitchens and the only meal on show is restaurant quality we have to ask ... is this real ? and if it is ...where is the reality of this family heading? Do I belong here, or have any real relationship with such perfection knowing my many flaws? How on earth could I relate to this ? 

We need to make the same evaluation of church. The sad thing Is that too many churches are more concerned about their projection to others than the reality of God amongst them. People have had enough fake family, and whilst church may have worked hard to be defined as a successful profile for a media savvy world, I suggest that everyone sees through it. The fake smiles of the ministry team (and their wonderful white veneers on the who's who profiles of a web site) will not see someone trust Christ but may possibly repel them at the first glance. The super kitted out stage, with the well presented and selected at the front,  may present a professional show, but that is all it is ... a show, and whilst there is no transparency before God there is no true church functioning. People who truly love Christ and God himself want the same thing... authenticity !

As I say I am pondering and would value your reflections (feel free to PM / IM/ chat) as I apply this to my own life and hopefully to others as by God's grace we train, learn and share in the global new community. How does this work in different cultures? Has our own (UK/ Western) culture become so normalised to the fake routine that we've forgotten how to do church (transparent family) without staging something?

Acts 2 is a critical passage. Sharing homes, eating together and living out of each others pockets is core to real church wherever we are. Being daily in each others homes does something healthy to our relationship recalibration. Hebrews 3:13 also points to the daily activity of devotion to God and each other being inseparable in our deep rootedness. Abiding (John 15) in Christ together brings fruitfulness. This is not a model for isolated profit or individualism but the fruit of The Spirit, the outworking of the life of God in the soul of the church as all become one, and grow unitedly in Christ (Gal 3:28, Eh 4:16).

We pray for good healthy churches to spring up, in the Uk and USA, Canada, across Europe and greater Europe, in Asia, Africa and in many unreached areas of the world yet to be reached or impacted by the family of God. Our prayer is that whilst each have a healthy reality of where they are, and who they are by God's providence they will also display the beauty of being real to others, and display routinely that the living God is amongst them, with them and yes... in them. May deep roots in his word (Col 2:7), and with each other bear much fruit as this authentically overspills in God's glorious global mission.

AUTHENTIC CHURCH AND AUTHENTIC GROWTH GO TOGETHER.

ACTS 2:42-47 And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe[d] came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.

HEBREWS 3:13

 But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.

GALATIANS 6:2

 Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

PHILIPPIANS 4:4-7 

(In the context of messy church - and what should be publicly seen ?) 

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness (gentleness NIV) be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Ref index:

  1. Genesis 17:7
  2. Genesis 17:8
  3. Exodus 6:7
  4. Exodus 20:2
  5. Exodus 29:45
  6. Leviticus 11:45
  7. Leviticus 22:33
  8. Leviticus 25:38
  9. Leviticus 26:12
  10. Leviticus 26:45
  11. Numbers 15:41
  12. Psalm 50:7
  13. Psalm 81:10
  14. Isaiah 41:10
  15. Isaiah 41:13
  16. Isaiah 43:3
  17. Jeremiah 7:23 
  18. Jeremiah 11:4
  19. Jeremiah 30:22
  20. Jeremiah 31:1
  21. Jeremiah 31:33
  22. Jeremiah 32:38
  23. Ezekiel 11:20 
  24. Ezekiel 14:11
  25. Ezekiel 20:5
  26. Ezekiel 20:7
  27. Ezekiel 20:19
  28. Ezekiel 20:20
  29. Ezekiel 34:24
  30. Ezekiel 34:31
  31. Ezekiel 36:28
  32. Ezekiel 37:23
  33. Ezekiel 37:27
  34. Hosea 12:9
  35. Hosea 13:4
  36. Joel 2:27
  37. Joel 3:17
  38. Zechariah 8:8
  39. Zechariah 10:6
  40. 2 Corinthians 6:16
  41. Hebrews 8:10
  42. Revelation 21:3
  43. Revelation 21:7


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